Because She Dont Love Me Now and I Wont Love Again
Would a girl all the same keep hope that I tin can win her dorsum in spite of a error that she says she can't forgive, even after concluding that she doesn't dearest me anymore? I tried to fix the mistake by explaining and merely made it worse, until my girlfriend finally told me she doesn't honey me now. She and I have pulled through so many problems together and our dear has gotten stronger, until now. I fabricated the fault by confronting her and asking hurtful questions, with the intent of clearing up all of our previous difficulties, but information technology backfired and simply hurt her feelings and then much she can't recall our good times anymore. If she could forgive me for this, nosotros would be set for life without all the old issues too...
She'southward changed a lot because of stress, and sometimes just seems like a different person but she always comes back. I've learned to trust her, but it seems she doesn't know how to trust that my real cocky will always come dorsum and improve. We concluded the suspension up a calendar week ago (the second actually, three weeks afterward getting together after her breaking upward with me because of college/career-prep related stress). That day was supposed to have been our 1 year ceremony...
I'k taking advantage of No Contact time now. It was really just our stress symptoms that separated united states both times...
She's been dealing with new, unfamiliar stress symptoms from career prep decisions and unsuccessful studying;
I had an unexpected relapse of obsessive compulsive thinking patterns left over from adolescent emotional trauma which affected me through most of higher until I managed to fix well-nigh of the symptoms. I'g working on fixing the underlying thought problems now, merely it's harder with this guilt on my mind and the fear that I've destroyed our human relationship permanently this fourth dimension. I understand he being wary of me since, as she said, she doesn't want to get more stress and there's no way to know I won't brand the aforementioned mistake again. But she continued to contact me sometimes over 3 weeks until the conclusive 'I don't love you anymore'.
I tried to show my confidence past saying how I understand the problem and that at that place'southward no fashion the mistake can happen again, only later talking for three hours (some skillful talk in the middle, too) I tried to conclude on a skilful notation only she didn't like it that I tried to tell her to be happy without me, and said "fine!' and hung up.
...I was stupid and sent a final message saying that I accepted her feelings, simply if she had felt differently I desire to exercise everything necessary to empathize her completely and be happy with her, and that I will e'er trust her heart.
She didn't reply, and cancelled our couple calling plan the side by side day.
The more I think from her perspective the more I understand how her feelings could be hurt by me and how sensitive her cocky esteem had get with all the stress. I care almost her too much to merely permit our beautiful human relationship finish in ruins similar this, and I'll exercise any is necessary to empathize her feelings for real then we tin both be happy.
Right now I'chiliad working on properly rebuilding my life without her, and I'm feeling much ameliorate. I notwithstanding tin can't let the sense of responsibility go though. It didn't accept to happen this way.
Afterwards giving some more time would it be good or would information technology be crazy for me to go back for her???
#ii
8 years ago
I'thousand in the same situation as you. Literally she said she has lost feelings for me and doesnt care about me anymore. We were together for 4.v years. The only way to go is no contact for a certain corporeality of time. I had no contact for i month and I met up with her and said i lover her but tin't exist friends with her because it would be also hard. i said goodbye and wished her well. Maybe this volition go her thinking about me more or mayhap non. Information technology'south meliorate than being a and so chosen friend.. that's rubbish. I will contact her maybe in 2 months but for now it's fourth dimension to exist a better you. Utilise this time to take control over yourself. you lot have no control over your relationship now. It'southward dead and i know it hurts but im in the same boat. Requite her space.
once y'all have the break up you can contact her and maybe encounter up as friends. that'south what i volition try and do. if she won't run across upwardly well then that'due south me screwed. but that'southward for you lot to detect out. do not be agape to try. if you truly love her then do endeavour. if she comes dorsum it means she truly loves you. if not and then she never did and it was a false feeling
focus on yourself and if you lot become a meliorate person she may become attracted to y'all over again. and so yeah there is a run a risk. you just can't be needy.
#3
8 years ago
Me and my girlfriend broke upward after being together for almost iii years. We were going to get married simply I totally **** up with her. She lost all trust for me now. It's been virtually 3 months now that we accept been broken upwardly. I all the same love her but she told me she does non love me anymore. I fabricated some mistakes with her simply I told her I know what I did wrong and I'll never do it again. She met a old high school friend at present she as a new man in her life. They are not together yet because they alive far apart. She is going to motility abroad close to him next year. I don't know what to practice. I love her nothing I can say that will aid. I wish we can be together again.
#four
viii years ago
#5
eight years ago
#half-dozen
8 years ago
I swear.. this was like reading a summary of what only happened to me. She didnt say that she doesnt love me anymore just I feel like thats the reason. Nosotros bankrupt upward nigh 4 weeks ago because of her stressing virtually college.. got back together 2 days later. She bankrupt up with me 3 days ago now.. Shes in college in a new town, and I think school has just actually afflicted her. She says she doesnt feel similar herself anymore. I miss her.
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#7
eight years ago
I feel the same manner sort of my girlfriend said to me one day she wanted to accept a break not permanate but its been three weeks since she told me this.... I was going to enquire her to ally me but I experience this weird vibe. Whenever its simply me and her I can flirt with her in a way and she does it back just whenever people are around she automatically goes to an argument or tries to she just yells at me. I dont know what to practice its been three weeks she never replies to my texts simply when I sent i asking if we could talk well-nigh u.s. shes been doing whatsoever she can to avoid information technology ☹️ it really upsets me I miss her and honey her then very much.
#8
eight years ago
Dude seriously?yous have messed up large time if she said to your face up just to punish yous that she doesn't dearest you lot or if she meant information technology well guess what ,she wants you to go lost anyway fifty-fifty if she has secrets that volition crush you when you find out ,but decided information technology's better you get the **** off then y'all improve get the **** off ,don't give her any more take a chance to boldness you ,yous know and I know you messed upwardly real bad and then what practice you do?
You give her 2 weeks of no contact.yep 2 weeks
And and so two more weeks of cocky love .yeah look into your life and ask yourself what makes you such a sucker if y'all find out give her 2 more weeks of no contact
Ok at present you lot have a total of 6weeks of no contact,
Proficient I hope you use this 6 weeks to keep going to work and smiling being happy that you are free to put your ***** in a new ***** ,ok you might be besides calendar week to exercise that but guess what yous have an excuse ,it's over .now
Go out with 3 friends,y'all have friends right?drink and smoke cigars ,yep be a homo
And don't speak to them about your ex in fact don't ever talk to any other human about your ex .we all get center cleaved hmm we go mind cleaved but if you tell us this stuff we lough at you lot ,...you lot know its *****?
Ok now await actually absurd and stay really at-home savour your life she won't come back so get on and accept some party girls to dinner yep if you get the chance sleep with them
If yous meet your dream woman(you won't if you are in the state of banging very thing)don't repeat your mistakes.
If you see that ex of yours don't fifty-fifty think about her .really she volition sense it haha and don't hate her besides
You will discover a new girl and yous know you lot need to detect a new daughter and so get out there and get your life on track if she happens to come back (I won't even use her for haul telephone call)
Then she has disrespected y'all again haha if she doesn't come back then she has respect for you,but if you should want her back and so poor y'all .
#9
7 years ago
YOU KNOW I SEE IT HAPPIN And so OFTIN... Not ONE TIME HAVE I READ ABOUT THE PERSON WHO SAYS "I DONT Honey You TRYS TO Make IT WRIGHT AGAIN.ALL WEAK ,,,SPOILED PUNKS THAT DONT Take AN OUCE OF FIGHT OR GUTS---WAKE Upward AND FIGHT!..THAT BULLCRAPE---WERE WENY THE THICK SPINE?---WHAT HAPPINED TO TRYING TO Discover A WAY---LOVE IS NOT ANY KIND OF GIFT THAT WE JUST USE.. Nosotros Take TO Piece of work AT IT--- I HAVE GIVIN Information technology A SHOT BY IGNORING ANY SHORT COMMING I Encounter AND Try TO SAY I Beloved Yous As MUCH AS POSSIBLE--- Agree HER Paw..Be GENTIL...Hold OFF ON Sex activity AND NOT PUSH--- AFTE 16 MOTHS OF SITTING TGETHER--SPENDING NIGHTS TOGETHER...WE HAD Ane FIGHT AND THAT WAS THAT---ITS WAS GONE----Only GUESS WHAT I STILL Take MY Cocky BECAUSE I GAVE Information technology 100% AND NO BS---SHE MAY Exist GAY---SHE MAY Be A POOR POSITVE BELEAVER AND IS A QUITER...THAIS **** WHEN SHE SAYS I DONT WANT TO LOOSE Y'all AS A FRIEND!!---
#10
7 years ago
M also on aforementioned boat, bt dnt knw wht will hppn its merely hope det she volition back out realty is if she realy dnt luv u ways she dnt, so dnt frce her to luv u back.
#11
7 years ago
hi there.im lesbian n i'1000 in the same boat. i ve been with her for a 3years n a half relationship.6months ago, she started to act afar north common cold although she kept telling me that i was the one n only, later on on she started blowing me the open up relationship matter although she never mentionned it before, i knew at that fourth dimension that she was having an thing but never told me so. few weeks later, i met a girl n told my ex that i have started dating her but the truth was that she was just a rebound to me, i later on chosen n met my ex north got back together, it's then when she told me that she had an matter with another daughter. i was hurting so badly so i dumped her north connected with my rebound girl. few days later, i chosen back my ex trying to empathize why she acted and so, she appologized n tried to convince me that it was a mistake that will never happen again. so, under her constant manipulative ways, she made cull betwixt her north the rebound girl, then i dumped the rebound girl.a month later, she started to grow cold over again, maxim i was pushing her away by the fact that i kept nagging about the affair she had with that girl. few weeks afterward, she dumped me over the phone and said that she could not honey me the same way i dearest her and that she needs space. i did all the don'ts, begged her, called her n texted her but she never answered me, i asked her to exist friends or simple acquaintance only she refused, saying that nosotros could non be friends after all we had together. i went into NC for iii months now . she never initiated any contact with me...
#12
vii years ago
Need help
I am 40 and my ex is 23. Nosotros dated for a year and she moved in afterwards ane calendar month. At start I pushed her abroad because of the age diff but afterwards fourth dimension she really grew on me and I felt she was very mature for her age. About six months in I lost my chore and I had a very hard time with information technology. I lost confidence and let myself go a little bit. I did non really take her out because I did not want to explain my situation to friends and did non want to spend my savings. Instead I chose to have romantic dinners and bike rides effectually our place. I actually felt closer to her and liked doing this with her. Needless to say our human relationship lost passion.
She started talking to guys on Facebook and I could feel her pulling away so I got controlling. She started "hanging out with guys from work who she said were friends". This made me angry and I felt disrespected especially when I was paying for everything! Then I put a boundary on her that she had to introduce me to her "friends" before she hangs out with them. She said I was smothering her and that she needed to move dwelling house be single to work on herself. I permit her get and figured this would be a good time to piece of work on myself. I really needed to focus on getting a job.
After three weeks no contact we met her for coffee. The whole time a guy was texting her it was an old young man from her by who treated her bad. When I asked her she said they were only friends and that she hung out with him to get her mind off of me. I asked if nosotros could piece of work on things and she said she felt she did not believe in her center I was the one for her. I said ok and moved on dating a new chick. She discovered this and sent me a message that subsequently some though she was confused and that nosotros could work on things. So we started dating again and it was bully best sex we ever had. Then all the sudden sex activity stopped and she pulled away once more. I checked her phone and she was getting more serious with the other guy making vacation plans. She caught me looking through her telephone and nosotros had it out well-nigh what she was doing and that I looked through her phone. She said she needed space and left. Afterward a week or two I got drunk and sent some needy text about loving her. I told her I would not be her fall back guy or backup plan. I said I was losing her number and moving on. She responded with this text.
"Kevin, I did honey you lot and from a distance I tin can proceed to love you simply every bit a friend and as a person simply it will require that you give me an extensive amount of space. I truly do appreciate all the joy you brought to me during the time we were together and how much you care about me. I wish I could give you all the emotions you need to brand you feel complete but I can't considering information technology was not meant to be for me nor for you. Information technology'southward something that I didn't get to choose...yous run across, there is a bigger programme for all of us that we were pre destined to take before we even entered into this globe. Nosotros can't always come across it and It doesn't always make sense and at times life will even make it seem vicious but please trust in this roller coaster and have religion in yourself. Nosotros had some wonderful times together but you deserve someone who volition love you only as much equally yous dear them." I did not respond! We take not talked in 3 weeks.
I put her on a pedestal and was very good to her. Do I nonetheless have a chance with her? I plan on working on me accept already lost xv lbs and really trying to get a job. I was hoping if I can get my things together I will gain my conviction back and she will be attracted to me again. Nonetheless, I deleted her from Facebook so she can no longer see how I am improving. I don't know how to build her attraction for me once more or get her to allow me a chance to get-go fresh with her. I feel a strong connection to her and I truly love her. I cannot contact her because it is but pushing her further abroad. Advice welcome.
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#13
7 years ago
KevCon,
I'm exactly where y'all are. Difference here is that she'due south 24 and I'm 28.
Came to gripps with the fact that she won't come up back.
My ex has already been or is planning to be with the 2nd guy post breakdown. And its non even the 4th month mail breakup nonetheless.
She made me feel like the last v years meant nothing.
I Started NC thinking I could get her back... And I did tried every affair before that: romantic gesture, talking to her, messages, telephone calls...
They just don't care for us, and it's a lie thinking distance will bring them back... they didn't care for united states of america when nosotros were with them, how can they miss usa if we aren't there?
NC and an ex comming back is an illusion. If she e'er turns her attention towards u, is because she could'nt get it to work with all the other guys she met during that time, and she'll settle for you.
Unfortunately even this is a long shot -- she'll probably encounter someone who'll actually intendance for her.
Think about you lot, my friend. Meditate, work out, run across new people... do whatever it takes and so that she becames a distant memory of times gone by.
There are so many lonely girls out there... And then many who'd love a partner.
Go a job, get in shape, get out. Live you life. Eventually yous'll be ok.
#fourteen
7 years ago
From feel let me say to KevCon:
It IS OVER. FOREVER. You lot won't ever get her back. Why? Because yous put her on a pedestal...that is why. Because yous kept saying "I love you lot," that is why. Because iii-weeks was not long enough for her to miss y'all and but dwell on the good memories; you lot met her for coffee after only 3 weeks when yous should have waited 4-6 weeks. Also, when she found out you were dating another woman, you lot should never have agreed to encounter her right away! You should have said, "Permit me think well-nigh it." Then called her 6 - 9 days afterwards to adjust a meeting/date for another 5 days out. You needed to re-ignite her allure to you. Instead y'all just slathered yourself all over her immediately after she gave you a second shot past having sex with her and worshipping her.
Worship = NO RESPECT
NO woman tin love a human she does not respect.
#fifteen
vii years ago
From experience let me say to you lot:
IT IS OVER. FOREVER. You won't e'er get her dorsum. Why? Because yous put her on a pedestal...that is why. Because you kept maxim "I dearest you lot," that is why. Because three-weeks was not long enough for her to miss you and only dwell on the good memories; y'all met her for coffee later only iii weeks when you should have waited four-six weeks. As well, when she found out you were dating another woman, you should never accept agreed to meet her right abroad! You should have said, "Let me think about it." So called her half-dozen - 9 days later to suit a meeting/date for another 5 days out. You needed to re-ignite her attraction to y'all. Instead you just slathered yourself all over her immediately after she gave yous a second shot by having sexual practice with her and worshipping her.
Worship = NO RESPECT
NO adult female can love a man she does not respect.
#16
7 years agone
I was with my girlfriend for four months in a half I broken upward with her iv days agone and we were together for iv months at present and the only real reason I break up with my ex girlfriend because she doesn't talk to me anymore and she abrasive me and she doesn't looking at me at all.
#17
vii years ago
Rocbottom,
I agree with you 100%. I can tell she does not respect me and that she has footling to no interest in me. Unfortunately, honey can brand the strongest man a boy I made huge mistakes! When we first dated I pushed her away and told her she was too young. Now I experience like the male child and she is in command. How can I flip it back on her? Or how tin I get her attracted again? She won't even run across me as a friend now because she says I am non set up to but be friends. I plan on not contacting her again for at to the lowest degree 3 months. Volition jealousy work on her. If I was dating someone else over again would she have interest again? I don't want to play games only I want her dorsum desperately.
Cheers!
#18
vii years ago
I was with a girl for 5 yrs .. She begged me for kids and marriage now two months broken upwards . She's saying she never wanted kids or spousal relationship . Because her mates back on the scene a mate that never had fourth dimension for her before . Plus she says she feels nothing for me anymore . But wears my hoodie that's besides big for her with my name on . And still has our pics together on facebook . I never was decision-making she was always going out clubbing and told me I was her world 2days earlier interruption up . I begged like a ***** for 3 weeks . But her mate is a coke head and influences her loads
#19
vii years ago
Paul,
What I accept learned from my own mess. Similar me yous are the guy that is comfortable for your daughter only you lot are boring and not heady. Be bold go brand a friend with the hottest daughter y'all can and become out with her every bit much as possible. And so human activity like yous don't care what your current girl is doing. She volition get very confused and won't like the fact that you are not focused on her. Dubiety builds attraction. While you practice this go a human relationship east-book and acquire to be an alpha male.. That is what your girl is truly attracted too. When your current girl comes running back to y'all human action indifferent!
Good Luck
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#20
vii years ago
I ain't been in contact for 11 days now and she ain't contacted me perchance she don't intendance anymore . I wish she would come dorsum but plainly I carnt make her . I just feel like I'thousand fighting a loosing boxing ..
#21
7 years ago
wel i am in same trouble. i had a luvly relanshp of 4yrs bt at present sudenly she says "i dont love u and m much happier wdout you" information technology realy hurts i hv been trying to woo her sinc 2mnths at present nd evryday she hurts me and insults me. probably long distance created ds stuff. bt finaly i hv decided to get an answr yes or no. i have planned a very romantic drama fr her. i have planned roses and guitar playin in the background nd hav thot to say sry fr nythn wch hs hurt her.. if she ***** bak it means she luvs me or lse she vl say NO and information technology wud help me to move on... lts c what happns... if d program works out i'l repost and ol d guys tin can effort wd dr ex-gf whum u wana gt bak nd luv truly
#22
7 years ago
This volition not work. She has already lost respect for you with your needy behavior. You are better off cutting ALL contact. Simply then will you have the slightest take chances at getting her back. I did all the needy behavior and now my ex won't talk to me at all and talks to me like I am a pitter-patter. I have sense met an astonishing Woman who is mature enough for a real relationship. I have bettered myself got a corking job and the cloud has finally moved on from existence over my head. I know that this is the time my ex is going to come around again. It would be difficult if she did but she has shown me her true colors and I deserve better. Please move on and don't wast time on your ex. Y'all are meliorate served and take a better take a chance by working on yourself. Good luck I wish that all your pain in your heat goes away!
#23
7 years ago
I feel yous ... It's difficult when the girl you dear just walks aways... But it's my fault I hurt her to many times and information technology's scares me because it seems like we are truley washed forever information technology hurts even more because we have a lil girl and was pose to become married.... I cry all the time thinking about the state of affairs... She say she don't know what the future holds ... What should I exercise
#24
7 years ago
I am in the aforementioned position as your stories. Was there 4 years agone with ex married woman later thirty yr relation and now again unfortunately with three yr old lovely ex feance, took her ring off a week before valentines 24-hour interval and would take been our ii year anniversary, threw my rose in the pool and got drunk with her friends.would like to permit her exist her as I beloved her but don't similar everything she does , and so maybe not the i for me and as she said 'i don't love you lot anymore' and previously was i don't fifty-fifty like y'all!Promise she warms upwardly as in the past and keeps trying as I not a liar and truely comitted to her and not snaking effectually as she claims.Just would prefer her to exist my partner when we go out socially , instead of everyone elses!
#25
seven years ago
I am in the same position as your stories. Was there 4 years ago with ex wife after thirty year relation and now again unfortunately with 3 year old lovely ex feance, took her ring off a week before valentines solar day and would take been our two twelvemonth anniversary, threw my rose in the pool and got drunk with her friends.would like to let her be her every bit I dear her but don't like everything she does , so possibly not the one for me and every bit she said 'i don't love you anymore' and previously was i don't even like you!
#26
7 years ago
I m in a situation similar that now I've been with my girl for about eight months. She loves me and I beloved her. At first everything was cool then after awhile nosotros will accept arguments every at present and then. I often would tell her that it was over I've done this around at to the lowest degree 4 times. Now she's fed up to the signal we're she doesn't phone call me no more. When calling her she doesn't answer the phone. Today I walk her to get her train. While she's getting on the train I tell that I love her. She said nothing. So I say to her oh you don't dear me no more than. And she saids to me that she doesn't know right now and she don't want to say something that's going to change things. What did she mean by that.
#27
7 years agone
Kevin please give her infinite... thats the mistake I fabricated! Just give her some space considering she is upset and the worst affair you lot tin can do is keep pressuring her.
#28
7 years ago
That sounds like me equally well I lost my girl friend virtually a month ago we were together for 2 years I loved her from the first time I saw her she was all a man could inquire for. She never cheated and was always there for me. She told me it was over because she wants to be single and focus on herself. I'm non a perfect guy but who is you lot know I made my mistakes simply this came as a full shock. I miss her and I've tried the first 2 and one-half weeks to get her back but she says she doesn't love me and information technology'south not yous its me thing. I can't even pick myself support because how bad my ego is destroyed. I wanted a time to come and accept kids with her. I'm twenty she's 21. Information technology really broke my middle I lost my job from just being then depressed that I couldn't even piece of work anymore. I planned a life with her and now it'due south all gone. I just desire my best friend back just she blocked me and won't speak to me anymore. I told her how much I loved her and how sorry I was. But I guess it doesn't affair. I just want to know if I tin fix it and get my beloved back. I tin can't even wait at other girls because all I want is my ex and take no energy to do anything about it. I planned on simply ending myself because all the stress is hitting me bad and I'm only 20 just turned twenty at that. I but need help
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#29
7 years ago
Anthony, hang in there my friend. The starting time footstep towards having a true relationship is learning to honey yourself. You can't really dearest anyone - and no i tin can actually dear you- if you don't dearest yourself enough to be your own person.
#30
7 years ago
I'm in so much pain later on the break upwardly, no contact is the hardest thing I ever done in my life. We were together 10 months, simply I was existence an a** to her the last calendar week we were together, she told me after the intermission up, she doesn't want to ever be with me once more, because if I loved her I never would've been so mean to her the last week, and she said she has no faith of at that place ever being an "united states of america" again, and she doesn't want to exist friends with me either. I gave her a CD tonight at her piece of work with a vocal I wrote for her, I'm a rapper and the whole schoolhouse knows and then it'due south like my championship really. Anyway, please tell me what to do, practice you think there's hope when she said, "You need to get out me solitary and find someone else, considering I don't even want to talk to y'all or wait at y'all anymore", I called her just considering I was drastic to talk to her.
Source: https://www.relationshiptalk.net/is-there-hope-even-though-my-girlfriend-said-she-doesnt-love-me-anymore-27171824.html
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